It's not the boy who I let tear through my core, it's the tear there before, that made this boy into more.

Well fuck it! Just when I think my stupid high school drama is through, it engulfs my being. Why does everything have to culminate in synchronization? I feel like curling up and giving up today. I guess I'm just letting everything get to me more than I should. So unmentioned boy calls me up with news I had been hoping for for quite some time- he has a girlfriend. I was relieved and happy that there would be one less person I would chance hurting. For some reason though, it saddened me. My outer shell was cracked and my yolk flowed out through my eyes. I think it was just the combination of everything I had been holding in plus this stunning blow that just pushed me over the edge. I kind of miss old unmentioned boy now, even though I think this change is one that is better for both of us. I think things are looking up- why this pushed me over the edge like I earlier stated- I have no idea. I guess it is the end of something that has been such a staple in my life for so long and not having it scares me a bit. It is the end of an era, unmentioned boy, but perhaps it was just our ice age and we will now be filled with warmth.