i was cleaning today and found this and since i haven't written a post in a hell of a long time...i found this fitting. and also devastatingly odd that a poem written about a half a year ago can still apply to the confusion. the style is inspired by john ashbery.
chemistry:
you always keep me waiting.
you ignore my every smile,
which is probably intentional.
you licked my lollipop once.
i am longing to be at the marina.
at least, no one drowns there.
i was assaulted by a mouse once
with an automatic stun gun. fought
back like a tree without branches.
wait, here stumbles another. he'll oil the windmill
to keep it spinning. well, it does. in pain.
in love, which is so much alike.
so we kiss our tulips in these such moments.
i believe i am more informed than my phys. ed. teacher.
bella sat on my lap, growing so fast. i said
pluck the petals, red or yellow. now
such colors seem mellow. i've realized i miss that fellow
from the cafe who gave me his number.
perhaps he moved to boston. i enjoy dancing
the spanish allegro, am pale, and use too much hairspray.
carole lombard is my all-time favorite actress.
and what do you say? do you, too, scream cryptics
with your tongue dyed ruby, pleading
for some cake and cookies, full
of sugar and spice? here they have bubbles.
look, one is floating over the rose.
they keep my secret. "oakland."
and all this time i silenced my heartbeat,
someone was obviously intrigued by me.
the boy tired and apparently married
a girl with blonde hair. now i have no hope,
no future for white picket fences and pta meetings.
i reluctantly surrendered too quickly
or much too late. chemistry books were shared.
i prayed i had found my demise.
too bad you wouldn't hold my hand.
